I Choose Me—Taking Off the Mask
- thewayofthewiseowl
- 4 days ago
- 4 min read
If you’re using strength as a mask, don’t be surprised when peace stops showing up.
The Truth Beneath the Smile
I used to think being strong meant never letting myself break down. I was wrong.
When my husband was falling apart, I played the rock. I held the house, the emotions, and the silence. I kept telling myself, if I just hold it together, maybe everything won’t fall apart.
So, I smiled.
I said, “I’m fine.”
But every night, I cracked a little more. That’s the truth.
Here’s the thing: emotional armor doesn’t just block pain. It blocks everything. You can’t numb the bad without numbing the good.
If you stop feeling, you stop living. Period.
For years, I wore strength like a trophy. People saw calm, confident, unbreakable. Underneath? I was running on empty. That wasn’t a strength. That was numbness.
Why We Wear the Mask
The mask appears the moment we stop feeling safe.
It’s the act we put on to survive chaos, heartbreak, or the fear that we’re just too much for people.
Maybe your mask is the caretaker—always fixing, always rescuing.
Maybe it’s the perfectionist—always smiling, never showing cracks.
Or maybe it’s the quiet one—staying small to keep the peace.
Whatever your mask looks like, it once kept you safe.
It gave you control when everything felt out of control.
But now, that so-called safety is stealing your peace.
Every time you hide, your soul is screaming. What about me?
The Moment I Realized My Mask Was Too Heavy
One morning, I stared in the mirror. Tired eyes. Fake smile. Heart on autopilot. I said it out loud: I don’t even know who I am anymore.
That’s when it hit me. I wasn’t protecting myself. I was burying myself.
The armor that once saved me was now suffocating me.
So, I took a deep breath.
And I said, “No more pretending.”
That moment didn’t fix my life. But it cracked the door open. That’s all I needed.
Removing the Armor with Compassion
Taking off your mask isn’t about putting your pain on display or trying to prove you’re tough.
It’s about honoring the truth beneath it.
You don’t rip the armor off. You peel it back, one honest moment at a time.
You say, “Thank you for keeping me safe. I don’t need you anymore.”
You start showing up for yourself in the small ways that matter.
by saying how you really feel,
by asking for help without apology,
by allowing yourself to rest, cry, or say no.
That’s what choosing yourself actually looks like.
Affirmation of the Day
Affirmations are powerful declarations that realign your thoughts, emotions, and energy with the truth of who you are becoming. Each day of this journey invites you to speak life into yourself — to replace old patterns of doubt, fear, and shame with words of strength, love, and confidence. As you repeat these affirmations, speak them with intention. Feel their truth in your heart, even if your mind hesitates to believe them at first. Healing begins with the words you tell yourself.
Take a deep breath, soften your shoulders, and let each affirmation remind you: you are worthy, you are enough, and you are becoming the person you were always meant to be.
🦋 “I am safe to be seen as I truly am.”
Say it out loud.
Whisper it.
Write it on a sticky note and place it somewhere you can see it. Let that truth sink in. Don’t just say it—believe it.
Journal Prompts for Reflection
When you start dropping the armor, life hits different.
You begin to breathe deeper.
You connect more fully.
You stop performing. You start being real.
You start laughing from your gut, not out of politeness.
You say “no” without guilt.
You cry without shame.
You love, not because you’re scared, but because you finally feel whole.
Does that mean life becomes easy? No.
But it gets real. And that’s what matters.
That’s what your soul’s been starving for. Not perfection. Not control. Just truth.
When you finally choose yourself, you quit chasing validation and start owning your worth.
That’s when peace shows up. For real this time.
Journaling Prompts:
Journaling is your sacred space—a mirror for your soul where honesty meets healing. These prompts are designed to help you slow down, listen inward, and uncover the deeper truths within you. There are no right or wrong answers here; only your truth, your voice, and your experience. Allow your pen to move freely without judgment or hesitation.
As you reflect, give yourself permission to feel, to question, and to release. Some days, your words may flow easily; other days, they may come through tears or silence—both are part of the process. This is where self-discovery unfolds and transformation takes root.
Remember: you are not writing to fix yourself; you are writing to meet yourself.
What mask have I been wearing to protect myself from being hurt or judged?
When did I start believing that strength meant hiding my feelings?
How has wearing this mask kept me from experiencing real connection?
What would it feel like to show up today as my authentic self?
What truth about me deserves to be seen?
Take your time. Be brutally honest. You’re not aiming for perfect. You’re aiming for real.
A Small Practice for Today: The Mirror Moment
Stand in front of a mirror.
Look yourself in the eyes. Don’t judge. Just meet the real you.
Whisper softly:
“I see you. You don’t have to hide anymore.”
Breathe deeply and let your shoulders drop.
Feel that release? That’s you finally letting go.
That’s your truth breaking through.
(For detailed exercise, click this link; )
A Closing Reflection from Dagmarie
I used to think my worth was measured by how much I could take.
Now I know my worth is about how honest I’m willing to get. Even when it’s messy. Even when it’s raw.
The world doesn’t need another person faking it.
It needs you. The real, unfiltered, beautifully imperfect you.
Today, drop the mask.
Meet yourself. For real this time.
And whisper the words that changed my life:
“I Choose Me.”
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